www.shhhh.com <- TO VAL, JERM, ESTBRA AND VANLEE, this is for you guys to stop laughing like lunatics in the library!

i'm blogging everyday, there is geog test this friday, i have no life, and that's bad.

my water bottle makes living a more fascinating than a day, even Ms Prab's amused by how Powderful it's England can get.

"wow Elaine, u make me learn new things everyday."

righhhhttttt :D

Weiling: OMG ELAINE WHAT DID YOU DO TO YOUR HAIR?!
Elaine: I burnt it.

thanks ah, thanks.

-

i am really thankful for a friend like Evonne Koh Ruiyu.

was freaking out and crying during band today. talked to Evonne and we prayed together. i guess it helped a lot :) thanks dear, i love you.

and i don't care what the world throws at me now, i'm gonna be alright. cause i know my God saved the day, and i know His word never fails, and i know my God made a way for me.

GENEVIEVE WONG DID NOT COME SCHOOL TODAY! me and Stacey missed her so much, there isn't anyone to talk to me about the Drake and Josh show (although i can barely understand what Gen's talking most of the time :D) our math papers were returned today, my results was like >:(-ingly shit. cried and cried and cried some more, until Shiai and i started laughing like insanes.. CTC was terribly annoyed by us but aiyer.

but besides that, the day has been pretty eventful :)

1. MADE MY IC, the woman kept complaining about my fringe during photo taking
2. CUT MY HAIR! and it's like so damn frigging short ahhhh but.. who gives a damn anyway D:
3. GOT MY PENCIL BOX -looks at Yushi.
4. got my sketchbook!
5. engraved my name on my player (:

Wanyi accompanied me all the way to the train today. we talked a lot, twas good. cheer up, I LOVE MY NUUREN! <3 and you will always be my number one :)

i have a list of ambitions drawn up, -looks at Shimah!
1. Professional Chinese Debater
2. Fisherman
3. Garang guni

and when all else fails, i'm joining the police force.

i'm going to the library to DO HOMEWORK later I AM EXCITED. really.
DORAEMON CARTOON!!! and casper, and garfield, and tom and jerry, and donald duck. i'm in for a treat this afternoon (: thank you, thank you Chan.

and Xinru, i will learn to play the birthday song on the tuba one day laaaaaaaalala, you lousy mean person :D

EXCUSE ME > Florence Toh Meijun and Lu Shiai. please stop trying to sign my guestbook with weird names like LAO PEH PEH or LIM PEH (although i must admit they suit you all so much) and whatever there isn't such places as orchard road alley 189 and geylang dragon alley #2. Han Yushi and Valerie Tan, you people knew about it. I FEEL BETRAYED, hurr D:

free period was so hilarious, Rachel Chan is my rubbish bin. we just talked a whole load of rubbish today. do you ever felt like that sometimes, everything you say just makes no sense? because i do :D had much laughter with Yushi and Jermaine too

i am suddenly reminded of a conversation weeks and weeks back.

Shiai: Elaine, i swear i will never laugh at you again.
Flop: Elaine, i swear i will laugh at you forever.
Cheryl: Elaine, i swear i will slap Florence when she laughs at you.
Shiai: -laughs.

so now Fatimah Lu Shiai is my slave, this is the consequence of breaking her promise 111002838274 times.

SooMAH, ShiMAH, FatiMAH. welcome to our world :D

house meeting today was, unexpectingly FUN, with Vanessa Lee and Cheryl. we were like so enthusiastic, screaming the cheers so loudly, i bet we brought much spirit to the house! but red house isn't going to be that happening on sports day, because i have band duties and Cheryl has sports leader duties, such a pity. played kiddy hand games with Cheryl, that person is such a baby and baika, and i love laughing (at her). i decided that i like house practs, and i think i am looking foward to the next one, hahaha.

i need to do math, and file my chinese work. i'm going to get hell from Chenjiayu tomorrow, for handing up my zuowens ONE day late. thanks ah.

-

Jesus, take the wheel
take it from my hands
cause i can't do this on my own
i'm letting go
so give me one more chance
to save me from this road i'm on

somehow this song sort of applied to my run. thank you Celeste, Valerie, Yushi, Shiai. thank you God.

though i dont really like the sound of it, it makes me old. but many people had made this year's birthday so beautiful, and i really thank God for that. received loads of Doraemon stuff. from stuff toys to piggy banks to comics to stickers. received wishes and messages from many, old friends and even those whom i hardly talk to. recess with Val and Shiai, Florence joined in a while after. im so glad that woman's alright :) lunch with my favourite squadtionmates, and then ET sang me a birthday song during sectionals. im the happiest person alive now.

ohhhh Wanyi wants me to blog about her, i flirted with my nuuren no. 1 a lot during lunch today. hahahhaa i love my nuuren so so much! to Jerm and Chan -> dont worry la, i love u all a lot too :D

Lim Zhen! i can't wait for thursday! <3

PARTAYEEEEEEE at Shiai's hostel today, and it was really AWESOME :) we ate so much, or rather, I ATE SO MUCH! and just look at the cake Shiai and Moomoo made :D



the pocky sticks were used as the alternative of candles as it is less hazardous, with courtesy of Lu Shiai. however, don't you just agree so much that they look like joss stick? you know.. those in the temple.. for the.. dead?

HOWEVER, i love it so much :D although it's very simple, IT'S DAMN SWEET! :D



me and Shiai, with the almost finished cake :D

ate chips, bread, and Shiai cooked maggi mee for me. watched hamtaro with Yushi before she left for training, HAMTARO IS SO CUTE. haha but Doraemon will still be my no. 1. Shee left, followed by Yushi. so it was me and Shiai. we talked, and talked, and talked. and when we have finally decided to get down to our homework, it was quite late alr. Val came, with her dog (ahhhh DOGS) and i sort of, freaked out :/ haha but Cookie is cute la.

OHHH, AND SHIAI BLEW DORAEMON BALLOONS FOR ME.



i love Shiai so much! and of course everyone who came :D i'm such a happy person this weekend, my brother gave me Presence DVD from Christian City Church, and im still hugging really tight to my Doraemon. i'm touched to tears :') i love birthdays so much, thank you for all who made it special :D

-

JENNA'S MOM HAS DISCHARGED FROM THE HOSPITAL, praise the Lord :) ohh, and she has sent me One Way and Free from Hillsong KIDS, and it is DAMN cute :D lalala.

would you believe me if i said
that we are the ones who can make the change in the world today
would you believe me if i said
that all of your dreams in your heart can come true today
would you believe me if i said
that life could be all that you want it to be today

and if i had wings i would fly
cause all that i need, You are
and if the world caved in around me
to You i'd still hold on
cause You're all that i believe
and the one that created me
Jesus, because of You
I'M FREE

would you believe me if i said
that God can make miracles happen today
would you believe me if i said
that you dont need to wait for the answers before you step out in faith
would you believe me if i said
that nothing is ever impossible for God

and if i had wings i would fly
cause all that i need, You are
and if the world caved in around me
to You i'd still hold on
cause You're all that i believe
and the one that created me
Jesus, because of You
I'M FREE

just live your life with God inside
you won't regret one moment of it
and give all that you can for God, for God

a few years back, i gave my life to Jesus Christ. i thought i was saved, but i did not had any faith, i did not have any trust in Him. i did not believe that He will always help me in time of need, and the assurance i had was close to zero. somehow it didn't work out. i drifted further and further away from God, my life got so screwed and messed up.

18th of march 2006, i am thankful for this day. service was as usual, the songs were lovely, the sermon was good. however, there was altar call as it was friendship connection week, and Wayne was going "Elaine, do you wanna rededicate your life to Jesus Christ?" and somehow, i just stepped foward, and i started crying non-stop. it was beautiful, we prayed and sang, and i cried and cried some more. i felt like i am finally living a life, the feeling that i had lost through the years, i got it back, and i have returned to God once again.

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus
you're my friend forever

e110 sang a birthday song for me, and gave me a book on God. and then they prayed some more for me. i thank God for my brother who brought me to church, and this wonderful cellgroup i am in now :)

-

Sunday wasn't a good day though, i dont know why but all of a sudden there was so much tension in the house. but when i went home in the night, everything just fell back to place without notice, like a miracle.

i love my friends, they make me smile :) dinner with Lim Zhen, Serene and Charis last evening. me and Serene almost died on the Al Fungae, the garlic was DISGUSTING! bought chocolates, and took photos in the toilet :D



<3

i did FOUR ams and ONE em last night, praise the Lord :D i think my brain's died though. attempted am 14 this morning, it was a killer. partying at Shiai's house later, chill and hangout (according to Shiai), and do homework. cool.

over the mountains and the sea
your river runs with love for me
and i will open up my heart
and let the Healer set me free

i'm happy to be in the truth
and i will daily lift my hands
for i will always sing of
when Your love came down

although everybody knows how a tubist n a basketballer makes a perfect couple,



i am very sad to say that i have just dumped Jay Chou for someone hotter.



LIKE TOTALLY <3

thank u, thank u ET :D for the baby, n the awesome cake. i love u all.

-

sometimes, well sometimes i do have some dignity. enough. i'm leaving it all here, u'll pick up the pieces.

the holidays had been so far so good :)

lunch with my brother in town yesterday!

there was math remedial this morning, i cant believe i actually survived more than 3 hours of math tdy. our brains were overbombarded with logarithms, me n Yushi almost died. n so i have decided to sing some nursery songs, to lighten up our spirits! we got insane n all, CTC was totally freaked out by us, i guess :D then there was cca, pumping session was horrendous! Guni n Guni's friend are my new pumping partners! anyhow,

the more we pump together, together, together. the more we pump together, the merrier we'll be. for ur pumps are my pumps n my pumps are ur pumps. the more we pump together, the merrier we'll be.

n then the 601 class gathering. a few of us just sat down, talked n ate... n pratically did nth. oh well.

im gg to town with Tan Weiling n Chua Yanbing tmrw, i cant wait :) n then there is this dinner with my family in the night. my mom was all going the "to celebrate our anniversary cum Elaine's birthday cum Timothy's A levels result" thing. all hail that woman. section lunch on thursday, cellgroup on friday, church on saturday, truthians dinner on sunday, celebrating my bday with the classmates on monday, i'm excited :) but i rlly dno how i am gg to start work n finish them before sch reopens

..

i'm a little teapot, short n spout
here is my handle n here is my pout
when i get all steamed up, hear me shout
just tip me over n pour me out

the word "glam" has never been in my dictionary w/o the "un".



she has survived the Gladiator, have u?

this is classic, Prabs was even charmed by me :D

alright there were these pre-fiesta promotions on friday, me n Chun went round the whole level (almost) to promote our game, n none of the people understood us. it was well, awkward :/ but anyhow, had rlly much fun taking photos n laughing :D setted up the stalls after school. me n Erica had established this Cheapo Club, with us as the founders, Stacey as the president, Den.ong n Gen as the members :)

Stacey says: "time is money, so we shldnt buy clocks."

i was damn amused with that statement, The Statement Of The Year :D got into endless fits of laughter with Ah Soh Erica too. we almost died carrying the mats from the PE room to St 13, n we got so depressed over wasted water. n this two dollar note which we did not pick up when we saw it lying on the floor. but it was rlly fun with my favourite auntie :D

n then, the day we have all awaited has finally came! FIESTA WAS A BLAST! it was rlly tiring, but rlly fun n well, tiring. went around promoting gladiator (with my charming bandages) n it was quite a failure. there were all sorts of people who turned up for the game, adults, teachers (Gladiator Choo haha), small boys, teen guys, bengs, gangsters, n primary girls. but there was NO sn secondary students who came! ): execpt for Peiling's seniors. ohwell. dunking was qte happening, Mrs Cheong stripped to bikinis. aha hilarious :D

took some time off n walked around with Yushi. bought loads of food! there were otahs, cheese sausages, n of course our favourite tutti frutti punch by this p1 stall. ate at the specs stand, i spilled the tuttie fruitti punch n ran back to get some more. haha Yushi is such a baby lah. but we were rlly happy when we finished our food! totally accomplished :D n then we walked around some more until Yushi had to go for her duty. Madeline came! :) talked to her. n i saw Evelynchenshangteng, n many people whom ive missed :)

went back to tend the stall, when all the bengs n gangsters came. there were these two guys who were so violent, they almost killed Celeste n Yijia. Shiai was so pissed off, she went to use the other sticks n hit them back. it was very hilarious n infuriating at the same time. n i got so tired my leg started hurting like mad.

further eating sessions with Han Yushi Mah :D we wanted to go to the haunted house but it was closed alr, oh wells. n so many food were sold out, bought meatballs n they were rlly good. got lime juice too becuse there was no more tutti fruitti punch :( so we ate n ate again at the specs stand, n we were very happy again :)

at this point of time my leg was hurting very badly, n i was walking like a duck. (according to Yushi) we had to finish our coupons, so we went to play stupid games! wanted to play the fishing game, but to my HUGE DISMAY, there were no more fishes left >:( so i played this shooting game, n i shot 9 candles out of 12! ALL HAIL ME >:D won two hello kitties, n gave Yushi one of them. played some rlly stupid "feed the loser superman" game, n won nothing but coffee bags =_= erps okay. so i left with 5 more bucks n i bought another hello kitty for Yushi n a bath scrub for myself from Cheryl Choo. hahahaha i feel so accomplished, n this was the best part of the day!



this is Shimah, SHE MADE MY FIESTA <3

it was a day filled with laughter, fears, hopes n tears.

ok that sounded rlly corny, but that was rlly what happened too.

the stress n the heat, the feeling has always been the same for us before every single match. the other three got rlly demoralised tdy n the days before, we almost died on ourselves. i was trying to lift their spirits but i broke down during assembly period too. things became better when i received my ppr, i think me n Shiai went insane. we went TOTALLY HIGH on our L1R5, weren't we? received hugs n well wishes, i didnt feel qte prepared for the real thing though.

n then the moment came. n i got so nervous i could not even speak properly, n i prayed. n i walked into the room, n i felt good, n i kept smiling, n everything was fine. i would even dare say tht i performed the best in this, as i did not stumble much upon my words. uttered some nonsense during zi you bian lun (as usual), everything seemed alright. although the atmosphere was heated, it wasnt as aggresive as the previous two. we all ended the debate with a smile n a handshake. everything was good.

n then i started flustering during cca. poor Evonne, i whined, screamed, talked rubbish..

Anges broke the news, "we lost".

i walked out of the band room, i cried. n i cried. n i cried some more. 8740814 nothings were running through my head. angst, hurt, pain, despair, uncertainty, wasted, injust, UNFAIRNESS...

i was totally broken. i would say tht we did well. n we were this close to the finals. this close to the chocolates. this close to the stage. this close to a match in front of the whole sch.

THIS close.

so i was being this selfish, irritating, self-piteous person.

i cant help it.

-

i took so long to write this.

but anyway, im feeling way btr now. listened to Where Is The Love (randomness), n i thought a lot. i rlly learnt so much throughout this whole debate journey, n never in my life had i ever thought i would debate, in CHINESE. being 3rd doesnt sound so bad after all :)

n i rlly wanna thank these people, sounds so cliche but aiyer.

-Chuwen, di si bian, the spark of the team, that made us come so far, n for nv failing to tickle me during discussions.
-Jenny, di san bian, for being such a great friend, supporting all of us n all.
-Yijia, di er bian, for helping me throughout the whole thing, n although u are always on the verge of giving up, u never did.
-Weiling, for being so selfless, n although ur class lost to ours, u did not mind at all n helped us with the research too. n of course for all your sweet msgs.
-Yushi, for being the first person to hear me rant n cry over the phone. ur hugs made me felt like a teddy bear.
-Val, for talking to me. all u said rlly made sense, it's all abt the process n not the results of it.
-Shiai Flop n Celeste, for ur undying love n support for me.
-all who have gave their well wishes, all who have comforted me aft the results.

n thank u God for helping me make it through this whole thing, n giving me wonderful friends like these :)

n plsplspls everybody, pls do not go to school tmr n say smth like "eh Elaine, we lost? REALLY? u sure? got double check?" or "are u ok? are u sad?". i appreciate, but it will do nth but to trigger my tear ducts. enough. i'll move on.

n lastly, all the best to 3 charity for the finals. Simin, Kah Yee, Wendy n Sinyee, u guys were rlly gd :) wo3 hui4 ting2 ni3 men2 dao4 di3!

Take control of your mind and meditate
Let your soul gravitate to the love, y'all

it's a world of laughter
a world of tears
it's a world of hopes
and a world of fears
there's so much that we share
that it's time we're aware
it's a small world after all

there is just one moon
and one golden sun
and a smile means
friendship to everyone
though the mountains divide
and the oceans are wide
it's a small world after all

it's a small world after all
it's a small world after all
it's a small world after all
it's a small, small world

Yiling n i love this song dont we :)

i spent the whole entire evening with Celeste yest. we were dancing under the moonlinght, dancing the night away :D we walked arnd the track, n danced some more. n then we talked for rlly long in the canteen, n trust me it was rlly good talking to her. I LOVE CELESTE KOH YUANXIN!

everything just crashes n u dno how to start over again.

with all i'm holding inside
with all my hopes and desires
and all the dreams that i've dreamt

with all i'm hoping to be
and all that the world will bring
and all that fails to compare

You say You want all of me
i wouldn't have it any other way

i've got a saviour and He's living in me, whoa
i wanna know, i wanna know You today
and You're the best thing that has happened to me
and the world will never take
the world will never take You away

no-one could ever take You away

You will always be there, won't You.

-

5.32 AM
me n Peiwen are ranting away about taiwan now. the stupid ou ran song, how shy i was in the sec ones' group (hahaha), the teapot who never shuts his mouth, how we practiced the family dance n went crazy (n i was trying so hard to hide my stained bedsheets), the shopping, the gossiping, n how we crapped abt everything n nothing. i miss those days so much, ahhh >:'(

-

8.01 PM
boring day, i'm updating again! n i'm talking to people who i love a lot. Jenna Wong n Tan Weiling! they make me :D :D :D all the time. there's so much to worry abt, but i rlly dont wna give a damn abt anyth now. tdy's rlly a meaningless sunday, i'm like procrastinating n doing almost nth, whatever. thank god for friends who keep me sane :D for the time being.

my brother got his A levels results tdy, bald n smiling. my dad's happy, my mom's happy, i'm happy. this house is gg to be peaceful for qte a while.

today, i gave Miss Teo Wanton a lesson on rythmic studies, just to teach her how to laugh properly. but Wanton is such a stupid person, she still laughs at that airy, spastic way. NUU REN! stop dui-ing away my lian la, u :D math n social studies was fantabulous with Han Yoyo Shimah. we talked about our lives, although she had coviniently forgotten everything.

Lim Soo The Tubist + Jay Chou The Basketballer = PERFECT :D

i miss Evonne Koh Ruiyu a lot. w/o her chickeness, w/o her high-pitched voice, w/o her whining, n w/o her to crap to, life in band is as boring as a chinese text book.

now that reminded me of the debate tmr.

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